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Day #25

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Sabaeliganism: Same as Sabianism (Middle Eastern religious precursor to Islam)

Gravenstein: A kind of fall apple marked with streaks of deep red and orange and of excellent flavor and quality

Buteonine: relating to or resembling a hawk of the genus Buteo; possessing large powerful hooked beaks for tearing flesh from their prey, strong legs and powerful talons.

—–

A pair of ruby traffic lights entomb the traffic totems in a momentary caesura, exhaust fumes swelling like lactic acid amongst the tyre treads. It’s lunch-time and across the zebra stripe road, a meal deal beckons like the pot of gold at the end of a monochrome rainbow.

The temperature drops as the automatic curtains are pulled back, chills are multiplying, the refrigerators buzz with a dead glow. A Nectar Card toting Indiana Jones perusing rows of sandwiches like the dates on a calendar, their packaging garish and cheap, their innards limp and listless. It’s a hot day and I can feel the curling lip of brown lettuce pulling at my heartstrings.

‘Excuse me.’

An office boy butts in, grabs a BLT, pack of crisps and an Innocent smoothie. He immediately blends back into the crowd, swallowed by a current of quinoa salads and flat-heeled shoes. Too much choice, where’s the little packs of fruit? Apple and grape, Gravenstein and Ruby Romans, Denmark and Japan, an unlikely yet decadent duo. However, I think it’s only Granny Smith slices and little purple marbles. The white tooth of the apple is stained pink.

Around a corner, I wish David Attenborough were here as I watch a woman, buteonine, snare her son with manicured talons, bright pink with white playboy bunnies – Sistine nails. He’s spilled a box of cereal and now he’s spilling tears. Wriggling like a freshly caught fish in his mother’s grasp. ‘And so the cycle of nature continues…’ mumbles Attenborough, eyeing a box of risotto rice that’s currently two-for-one.

‘Bentley! Bentley, now you c’mere! Little shit! What’cha fink yer doin? And where’s yer sister? Mercedes! Mercedes!’

What’s this woman the head of, a family or a car show room? ‘I’ve think I’ve got the wrong program,’ mumbles Attenborough as he joins the back of the self-service queue. He’s gone from my mind by the time I reach the front, not that anything else could be when I hear the sonorous cry of ‘next please!’

Dominic scans then bags my goods and I’m left to my own devices – idle, hifalutin ideas; the sort that wouldn’t fit through a 10-items-or-less lane. Sainsbury’s to Lidl; Jamie Oliver to…well, someone; Islam to Sabaeliganism. Good word. A Wikipedia binge paying dividends.

‘D’you want any cashback?’ asks Dominic, broad chested and dark hair closely shorn.

‘Nah, it’s ok. Wait…no.’

If you don’t have it, you can’t spend it. That’s simple logic. That’s just one of the epiphanies I’ve had whilst tapping my pin code into the little fiscal Ark of the Covenant, fingers lithe as Mozart in the morning. Digits swirl, melt, LEDs expire and resurrect just down the street, little digital abacuses sending messages in Morse, a cacophony of 1’s and 0’s that dictate all and don’t really exist unless we all believe in them. I keep the receipt, just in case.

When I leave the store, bag in hand, receipt in pocket, the midday sun washes over me and I decide this must be how a reptile feels.

Day #24

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Breathe: To inhale and exhale in the process of respiration to respire

Stinter: One who or that which stints

Struthiones: Genus of ostrich

—–

‘What are you doing now?’ hissed Jez.

‘Having…’ there was the satisfying click of locks singing in unison, ‘…patience,’ concluded his partner.

Jez hadn’t asked his name, he didn’t even know where the boss had found the guy. But if he was good enough for the boss, then he was good enough for Jez. Still though, there was something off about him, although quite what exactly, Jez was having a hard time putting a finger on.

His partner eased open the metallic slab of the vault door, thicker than a man yet swinging open in silence as though it didn’t even exist. Never the stinter, Jez eagerly craned his head forward, looking beyond his partner, and his eyes bulged. Gold bars stacked in ordered piles, tightly packed like bricks and gleaming like some kind of futuristic metropolis. Both men had to remind themselves to breathe.

‘H-How on earth are we going to move all this lot…?’ stuttered Jez.

His partner strode forward and grinned. It was unnerving. Jez had never known anyone to act so, so, so relaxed in the middle of heist before. Let alone one that involved somehow evacuating several hundred bricks of gold from the basement of a bank without being seen.

‘Doesn’t matter. Say, did your benefactor explain to you my particular set of skills?’

Jez shook his head.

‘Ah. Well, this next part might become confusing then. See…you’re going to have to stay here, I’m afraid.’

Jez stared at the man. ‘What? What the hell are you talking about?’

His partner’s eyes were the glacial blue of an Icelandic spring. A faint smirk sat upon his lips.

‘See, Jez, you need to stay here, because I’m about to do this-‘

The man suddenly raised his hands, fingers arched, and started murmuring under his breath. Jez’s arms and legs fell numb. He tried to yell, to scream but was unable to do so. He was frozen in place, the head of a struthiones stuck in the sand.

Slowly, the bars of gold began to rise up and float towards the stricken Jez, eyes bulging, now from fear instead of greed. The bars slowly entered his body and began to fill him up, brick by brick.

When Jez was full of gold, his partner lowered his hands.

‘What…have…you..done?’ stammered Jez, his voice strained and distant, his body stacked in rigid towers across the floor of the vault.

‘I’ve swapped you with the gold,’ replied his partner. ‘A simple spell, but a pain to get right. See I’m just going to walk out the way we came in, with the gold walking alongside me! As for you my friend, you have to stay here in the vault.’

‘Like…this…?!’

‘Yes, like that I’m afraid.’

Jez’s pleading finally ceased when the vault door clicked back into place. As he left the room with the gold following just behind, the man couldn’t help but mutter to himself ‘I did tell you that I have a very particular set of skills…’

Day #23

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Teal: Any one of several species of small fresh water ducks of the genus Anas and the subgenera Querquedula and Nettion

Solid: Having the constituent parts so compact or so firmly adhering as to resist the impression or penetration of other bodies

Primer: One who or that which primes

—–

The early evening crickets serenade each other as I take my seat. Front row and full of splinters. This is our bench, mine and yours. It’s even got your name written on the plaque, solid and real, just as if you were here with me now. It used to be a rich toffee copper, but today it’s the colour of an overcast sky. It looks like it could be a reflection of the pond, a murky blue, cold and mysterious. You remember the pond, don’t you? The one with the ducks? You used to enjoy it so much here.

I remember the look in your eyes the last time we met, hollow and sparse, like artic tundra, so empty and alone. I’m sure my name was on the tip of your tongue; rumbling on your lips, ready to erupt and spill forth like hot lava. But I guess it cooled; a small, calcified island in the stream of your consciousness. I bet my name sounded like static to you, early evening crickets chirruping as though you were tuned into the wrong station. The doctor’s tablets couldn’t always change it back.

The wind is picking up and it’s grabbing at me, even through my coat. I’m wearing the one with the sheepskin inside, tatty and yellowed; it’s the one you got me for Christmas in ’89. Still going strong, just like me. It is cold though, cold enough for the ducks to be huddling amongst the reeds at the edge of the pond.

They look like Teals, at least I think they do. I saw them labeled in a book once; you got that for me too, picked it up at some jumble sale or second hand store. You told me it would be a good hobby. The Teals remind me of you, so I make a mental note of what they look like. Watertight petals of brackish brown feather, small black eyes, opals flashing with curiosity, a leathery bill like a scuba flipper.

They remember me even though you didn’t. I wish you had. I am the one who feeds. We were the ones who fed. I’ve brought the breadcrumbs with me. You always liked the ducks. Well, you did on your good days, on your bad days – not so much. You liked how they could fly away from their problems whenever they wanted.

I miss you, but I thick I have to set you free now. I loosen the blue plastic tag around the bread bag and start throwing crumbs. You will always be with me. Even though the bread is grey and speckly, the ducks swarm around me; quacking at their primer, who directs them like a concert virtuoso. Be safe. Crumbs here, crumbs there, beaks squabbling amid croaky yaps of excitement. I smile when I realise you’ll spend the winter down south, you always did want to spend Christmas in the sun.

I place your urn at the foot of the bench, empty, and watch the ducks fly off into the sunset.

Day #21

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Nah: No, not

Hydrosome: a colony of Hydrozoa, related to jellyfish and corals

Pentachenium: A dry fruit composed of five carpels (female reproductive organs), which are covered by an epigynous calyx (ovary tube, sepal) and separate at maturity

—–

Shoals of tiny fish flickered above the two divers, molten scales glinting as they grouped into tightly spinning balls before scattering skittishly whenever a larger fish passed nearby. In the glowing effulgence of the early afternoon, these aquatic dogfights resembled the cat-and-mouse antics of fighter plane pilots, dancing amongst the clouds of phytoplankton.

Broad, crepuscular rays of light bathed the divers, who were busy foraging amongst the coral reef, a sprawling mass of fantastical structures and colours, rich as trees made of precious gems. Both hunting for hydrosomes, they were working apart, one delicately plucking polyps from the upper boughs, whilst the other scoured the detritus on the sea floor.

Small waterproof sacks hung from their weighted belts, each full of tiny, tentacled creatures – whose strange whose appearance was almost alien-like. Their thin, sepal like feelers groped wildly in the dark sack, shrinking as they encountered one another, then curiously probing again.

A wobbegong shark suddenly erupted from the sea bed, disturbed by the lower diver’s digging. It flicked itself free of sand then fled through the scattered dirt into the deep blue that framed the reef. Although he knew the bottom-feeder was harmless, the diver felt his heart pounding, adrenaline surging, heavy waves crashing on the shore. He tried to swallow some nervous saliva but with a mouth arid from his air supply, it sat uncomfortably on his tongue instead, thick and viscous.

As the sand slowly started to sink the diver noticed something glinting on the seabed, must have been stirred up by the wobbegong. He glided in for a closer look, a small clown fish hovering over his shoulder. There was a shallow crater where the shark had been nestled, a few inches deep and a couple of feet long. The glinting lay at the bottom of this depression, catching the sunlight that filtered through the turquoise water.

Curious, the diver started slowly scraping the sand aside. A few small shells and polished bits of rock slipped through his hands, but pulling back the silt he could feel his heart starting to race again. Metal, gleaming and unblemished, unveiled itself slowly…and it didn’t seem to stop. Faster now, the diver scrubbed some more sand away, then some more – still more metal. This isn’t possible…nah this absolutely cannot be happening…

The diver knew from the size of the reef that it was hundreds of years old; you didn’t get underwater gardens of Eden appearing overnight, it took time for calcified pentachenium to form and grow, let alone one of this size. But if that was the case, then how the hell did you explain what he had just found…? It would mean that…no, it just wasn’t possible.

Looking up, the diver could see his partner floating among the lofty spires of coral, engrossed in her work. He had to tell her…this was just crazy!

With fingers tingling and heart pounding, he kicked off from the seabed, the metal glinting through sand.

Day #20

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Planimeter: a measuring instrument used to determine the area of an arbitrary two-dimensional shape.

Infucation: The act of painting or staining especially of painting the face

Undergo: To go or move below or under

—–

Mr Wills hadn’t left his house for two decades after returning from the war. It was for this reason, along with the honeyed windows and the reams of cigarette butts that littered his garden, that most people assumed his house was abandoned. It was just another one of those buildings that the postman delivered leftover junk mail to, the council couldn’t care less about and whose neighbours were too busy collecting their weekly giro to really pay attention to anything outside of their taxpayer funded inner sanctum.

Truth be told, this suited Mr Wills perfectly well, for he had a task to complete. It was essential that he complete this task or He would not be happy.

The elderly man got by on very little, drinking only tap water and eating only egg and cress sandwiches, but without the bread. He kept several hens in his conservatory and grew cress in every available window, so he rarely went hungry. His appearance seemed unaffected by this curious diet and so he bore the same look of any man slightly past his prime –thinning hair and greying temples, skin slackening like worn jeans and a pair of rheumy eyes that were more at ease behind a set of strong lenses.

Mr Wills spent most of his time completing his task, rarely breaking for lunch. Instead he rose early for a snack at daybreak, then finished off any leftovers before he went to bed. Mr Wills didn’t particularly like sleeping, as this was when he had to undergo the nightly status report.

He would regularly berate the elderly man for his painful fastidiousness, asking why he couldn’t speed up and when did he think the task would be done. Mr Wills, who felt he lacked the authority to speak up and say that he had never actually been told how to complete his task, instead simply dreamed of nodding. It had taken many years to perfect, but Mr Wills now knew that to pacify the voices he simply had to nod and He would slowly dissipate into the recesses of his mind, like a sea mist under a midday sun.

Sitting at his desk one morning, Mr Wills was hard at work. He would scribble wildly on a piece of paper with a fountain pen, measure the area of this arbitrary, non-Euclidean shape with a planimeter, make a note of its area in a nearby ledger and then begin the tedious infucation process. He used paints made of crushed clay and dirt, mixed with water and then dabbed lightly into different sections of the scribble – any acrylics he’d once owned had been used up years ago. He then hung the final product on the wall with a pin in each corner, taut.

These strange paintings slithered over every inch of every wall of Mr Wills’ house like snakeskin, a haunting mural .

A short while later, with russet sludge dangling from the tip of a very fine paintbrush like snot from a nostril, Mr Wills was disturbed by a sudden buzzing. It buzzed twice then stopped, so he ignored it. When it buzzed again five minutes later, Mr Wills finally realized what it was. It was his doorbell.

Day #19

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Growler: One who growls

Theocracy: Government of a state by the immediate direction or administration of God hence the exercise of political authority by priests as representing the Deity

Necessitation: The act of making necessary or the state of being made necessary compulsion

—–

Hangdur slowed the geeter to a halt. The giant bird’s thick, muscular legs quickly disappeared amongst the heat haze that rippled on the ground, an invisible lake. Shouldn’t think about water, mused Hangdur wryly, stroking his steed’s neck, the hard feathers metallic to the touch. The geeter grunted; its call was guttural and raspy, definitely parched.

Holding onto the reigns, Hangdur jumped down and tentatively approached the stone archway that loomed ahead of him. Beyond the archway sat the mountain – the only thing for miles around – jutting out the ground like a giant, lone stalagmite amongst the scrub. If what the old man had said was true, then Hangdur had to pass through the stone archway if he ever wanted to find the Kophi Sphere.

The geeter seemed suddenly hesitant, digging its wide, webbed feet into the ground. The bird was similar to an old world ostrich, two legged and entirely flightless, built solely for running. The fallout had caused the geeters to grow larger, stronger and more aggressive. They were the new battle stallions, more vicious than horses and less prone to erratic behaviour too. Besides, when was the last time anyone had even seen a horse?

‘Come on, boy,’ said Hangdur softly, tugging the reigns to gently coax the geeter forward. The bird put up a brief struggle then resignedly acquiesced, each step long but tentative. As the bird and its rider approached the archway a throaty snarl snapped through the early evening quiet. It sounded close. Hangdur slipped a gun from the holster on his back – a piecemeal weapon, metallic pipes twisted and soldered together like an Escher sketch.

From behind a rock a growler slunk forward, ribs showing and a dead-eyed hunger etched into its face. It snarled again and brazenly stalked forward, caution cast aside by the necessitation of hunger. Its patchy, sandy fur bled into its surroundings rendering it almost invisible in the twilight, a living, breathing optical illusion.

Hangdur quickly fired a warning bolt that struck and clattered off a nearby rock. The growler stopped moving, contemplating and weighing up its options, eyes wide and watery. A few seconds later, its decision apparently made, the growler bolted into the encroaching darkness. Gone – for now, at least. Gonna have to keep an eye open out for that son of a bitch, noted Hangdur.

Free to pass, Hangdur and the geeter passed beneath the stone archway. It was an impressive structure – hewn from the mountain and standing almost 20 metres tall, every inch covered in ornate carvings. Who had done them and why was a mystery, and seeing them up close reminded Hangdur of tales he had been told as a child. He shivered involuntarily, slight doubts ominously massaging his conviction. To calm himself, Hangdur flicked on the flashlight that hung from a strap draped over his jacket then switched on his co-locator, fingers squashed into a pocket. At least if the growler got the better of him now, they’d still be able to find his body.

‘That’s the problem with theocracy, boy,’ said Hangdur absentmindedly, ‘they always want you to track down the damn relics and they don’t care what you gotta go through to get ’em…’

Hangdur’s voice trailed off in awe, echoing queerly on the rocks, as the pair emerged from the archway and into a steep sided canyon that shimmered like glass.

Day #18

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Despotism: The power spirit or principles of a despot absolute control over others tyrannical sway tyranny

Flatulently: In a flatulent manner with flatulence

Movie: A motion picture

—–

The cold light of early morning scatters through the blinds, zebra stripes that cast strange, abrupt shadows. Light and dark. The room is small, claustrophobic, and devoid of anything bar a table, a few seats and a tape recorder, which sits in the centre of the table ‘in case of disputes’ – well, that’s according to her lawyer at least.

She’s late – as usual. A typically arrogant move that means you’ll have to sit and enjoy the silent ménage a trois between yourself, your lawyer and her lawyer for a little bit longer yet. You wonder if whistling might lighten the mood, or humming. Instead you start preparing a long-winded and gregarious opening gambit, one that you’ll deliver so flatulently, that the vein in her neck will begin to pulse. You smile at the thought of it burrowing and bursting forth like a movie monster trying to escape. It would certainly solve a few problems.

She’s locked you up tightly in here, the stripes of light like prison cell bars, and you just sit silently obedient, showcasing the manners of an expensively trained dog. She always wanted a dog, but you said no. You argued the toss – who’d clean up the mess? Who’d stay at home to keep it company? This isn’t a fucking Scooby Doo movie, you shouted, it’s our fucking lives. No, you didn’t fancy a dog.

You look at your watch, time moving so slowly that even the imperceptible movement of the second hand feels like the aftershock of some seismic event. Tick, tick, tack… wait, did it just move backwards? You can’t be sure. It’s too early in the morning for this. You stifle a yawn. Her lawyer suddenly perks up, scrutinising this apparent sign of weakness. He looks as if he’s about to say something, a rebuttal on the tip of his tongue, but decides better of it and instead hurriedly scribbles something down.

The lawyer sitting next to you, a thin, balding man with an eagle’s beak of a nose, is engrossed in the documents before him. Sucking up all your dirty little secrets like a sponge. Sure, he’s defending you, looking out for your interests, but what’s stopping him from holding things over your head if it all goes tits up? She always did, why should he be any different? Maybe it was the weight of those expectations that eroded your self will, made you get drunk and want to explore new and exotic avenues. Yeah, you could blame her, you suppose, but you know that her lawyer has exactly the same notes and will shut down that play instantly.

She’s still not here – a classic case of female despotism syndrome. Always has to be centre of attention. Always has to be fashionably late. Always has to spend your money on whatever Vogue suggests. One pair of shoes the same as a deposit on a house. You hope the heels gave her blisters.

You check your watch again, a Pavlovian response to your own nerves, and notice how the black inlaid roman numerals look like the bars of a prison cell.

Day #17

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Peirastic: Fitted for trial; experimental; tentative

Catholicize: To make or to become catholic or Roman Catholic

Adrianople: a city in Northwest Turkey a Thracian town that was rebuilt and renamed by the Roman emperor Hadrian

—–

It was definitely the wet slurp followed by the smacking of lips. That was the only way to shut Beaver up; you had to show him you were busy drinking. Buck took another swig of his beer, amber liquid sloshing against the sides of the dirty glass. With each mouthful, the liquid sunk lower and the glass was raised higher, and at some point Buck had started likening the orangey distortion of Beaver’s face in the bottom of the glass to a strange insect stuck in amber. Both of ‘em bloodsuckers.

The two men were sat in the corner of a dive bar out on route 23, not their local haunt, but one that had been chosen for them. The beer tasted different and a dense hum of smoke hung in the rafters like bats. The locals were the dregs you’d expect to find in the bottom of a barrel, leftover flies on a spiderweb. The woman behind the bar, heavyset and stocky, was wearing a leather waistcoat she’d probably found ditched in the toilets; it had a faded motif on the back, a skull with a snake squirming through the eye.

Buck didn’t like the place, but Beaver, well he was happy anywhere he could sit and drink and talk. It didn’t matter who else was around, the man could talk to anyone; in fact it was because of Beaver’s big mouth they were here. Shouldn’t have listened to him, thought Buck glumly.

‘…So that’s why Hadrian didn’t just build walls,’ concluded Beaver. He produced a silver sheet of tablets from a jacket pocket, popped two of the caps and dropped them into his Whisky Sour, which fizzed angrily. Buck didn’t know exactly what the pills were, but Beaver had explained that they were some kind of peirastic benzodiazepine anticonvulsants – “experimental anti-anxiety pills” apparently.

Beaver chucked his head back and let the frothy orange liquid trickle down his throat. He flicked his tongue out, like a cat yawning, trying to get rid of the taste, then signalled to the bar for another round.

Buck’s attention was drawn to a crucifix hanging over the entrance. He hadn’t noticed it on the way in. How the fuck can you catholicize a place like this, he thought. He realised Beaver was staring at him, red-eyed.

‘Huh?’ asked Buck.

‘Adrianople, man! Fucking city named for Hadrian – he ain’t just been building walls. He’s been doing all sorts of shit, man.’

‘What the fuck are you on about Beaver?’ snapped Buck, beer foam glistening in his stubble. ‘I don’t give a shit what this Hadrian’s been doing or what he’s gonna do. You just keep that bag close, y’hear? That’s the reason we’re in this fucking mess.’

Beaver clammed up into a sullen silence and hugged the bag tightly to his chest. He looked like he was about to say something when the sudden eerie yawn of creaking joints made both men turn their heads toward the entrance. A man stood there, the briefcase in his hand stained red by an electric Budweiser sign.

‘I think this is our guy…’ said Buck, his voice tense.

Day #16

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Crenulation: A minute crenation – of a leaf or shell, as being round-toothed or having a scalloped edge

Rounder: One who comes about frequently or regularly

Excursionist: One who goes on an excursion or pleasure trip

—–

Over a scruffy, ripped shirt, red checks bleached pink, a beard hangs like a plume of grey smoke, a pile of ashes in which the veins of burnt leaves have tangled like wire wool. A mouth hides beneath the hairy crenulation, wise words waiting to pounce. Two small eyes watch the world like pebbles dropped in water, the ripples permanently etched on his face, as though at some point he’s been glued back together.

A cardboard sign leans against his crossed legs, the haggard jeans not fit for a scarecrow, yet thick enough to sleep in. They’re covered in a patchwork of colourful stains, comfy Dutch tulip fields. The yellow stain of a dogs urine; the flaky red of McDonald’s ketchup; the crisp maroon of blood. These are stains that imply character – a machine washable anthology of memories, blotchy runes.

On the sign he’s written:

Senseless Lamentations – 50p
Empty Platitudes – 100p

He caters for all types. He calls it ‘offering a service to the day-trippers’, those excursionists who only hit the boardwalk when the sun is out. A styrofoam cup nearby implies that neither offer has been well received today. Must be the weather. Besides, some of the coins have probably in there for weeks now. His only friends. Better than friends. Can’t spend friends on cigarettes.

Slumped in his archway, he acts as a way marker; once a human, now a sign post for those trying to find their way to the beach. A five-fingered constellation, daubed on the pavement like yesterday’s hopscotch. There’s a smell, always the same, that clings to him almost paternally, almost with form. It smells like spilt milk that’s gone bad in the heat. It cloaks him, aggressive as the sickly sweetness of burning rubber. He doesn’t notice it anymore, but it seems to keep the rats away.

A noise stirs him – sounds like the rounders are back again. The small coven of Romanian crones wander the boardwalk, squawking with empty hands outstretched, feeding invisible birds with invisible seed. Ignoring the rounder’s unintelligible babbling, he casts an eye over his styrofoam treasure chest, lazily like a sprawled dog eyeballing a chewed up toy.

Looking around, he sees a kid break away from holding his mother’s hand. A glacial calving in the mother-son dynamic. The kid seems embarrassed to have been spotted displaying weakness. The kid tugs his mother’s blouse, thin and splashed with leopard spots, and points at the man. She reprimands her son, rubs his hair, then acquiesces and reaches into her pocket.

He approaches tentatively, and drops two coins into the styrofoam cup. New friends, new cigarettes.

‘Why d’you sleep outside?’ Asks the kid curiously.

He grins – maybe – but the beard makes it hard to tell.

‘It’s way too hot to sleep inside this time of year.’

‘Oh,’ the boy looks confused for a moment, then laughs. Running back to his mother, the boy calls back ‘have a good day!’

‘Could be,’ he says, nodding. ‘Could be.’

Afterwards, he lies down on his cardboard mattress for the rest of the afternoon. Eventually the shadows of evening blossom and the furrows on his face ebb like waves on an ancient shore.

Day #15

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Intervisible: Mutually visible; each in sight of the other

Sister: A female who has the same parents with another person or who has one of them only

Accuser: One who accuses one who brings a charge of crime or fault

—–

‘So I put it to you Goodie Western, that you are a witch. A bride of Lucifer and weaver of sinister spells. The punishment for which, of course, is death.’

The Hunter raises his staff to the judge and takes a seat, thin wooden legs splaying under his weight, then slings an arm lazily onto the table before him. The cuffs of his jacket are an off white, greasy.

‘Yes, thank you Mr. Lancaster, your testimony has been noted.’

The Judge, old, chipped from wood and mossy. Hunched into the uncomfortable high chair behind the dais. It’s the law. He coughs gruffly, some kind of chest cold or some such. He begins speaking in reedy tones,

‘Goodie Western, your accuser stands before you, your contentions are intervisible betwixt you, and it is by the grace of God that I am required to hear your testimony – now in this court of fair and just law.’

The silence is thick, muggy, rife with peasants trying to work out what the word ‘intervisible’ means.

‘She’s a witch!’ calls a voice from the back of the room. The Judge roars to life instantly, a hawk grabbing a fish,

‘Silence! Silence Mr Robertson – Apprentice Tanner,’ he spits the words vilely, ‘remove him now!’

Mr Robertson, apprentice tanner, is removed from the room. A twinkle grins in The Hunter’s eye. It’s almost too easy. As she stands, the woman’s chains remind him of falling coins.

‘You may begin, Goodie Western,’ says The Judge, magnanimous once more, composed and gnarled as bark. The old woman nods, the folds of her skin scrunched up like paper and almost translucent.

‘I see here before me,’ her delivery is loud and crisp, intoxicating in its subliminal ferocity, ‘friends. And good people, but I don’t see no family. And why’s that? Because my sister is dead. And I stand here before you all, accused of her murder through witchcraft. You all knew her condition then. You all know me now. It were my medicines that made her better, you all know that.’ The old woman pauses, casts a bruised eye over the small crowd. ‘Goodie Meadows, who was it what delivered your three chillen?’

Goodie Meadows feels the heat of a dozen pairs of eyes boring into her, iron pokers, she shudders in her soul. Without saying a word, she nods. Several more white heads bob up and down of their own volition. Lot of chillen in this town here today because of Goodie Western. Lot of women too, come to think of it.

‘And what do we know about this man here?’ Goodie Western points at The Hunter, the glint in his eye slightly smaller, shrinking. ‘This man, who appears from nowhere last week, days before my sister was murdered, yes murdered! This man who calls himself a hunter of witches and decries me as a sibling killer and a bride of lucifer! Where were you that night Sir? Where were you?’

She spits on the ground, there’s blood in it. It was a rough night.

A single bead of sweat rolls down The Hunter’s temple, the glint in his eye just a flicker. The old woman is good, very good…but he’d come across better.

‘Mr Lancaster?’ says The Judge.

Tidying his cuffs, The Hunter stands, clears his throat and begins to speak, greasy fingers leaving their marks.