So my exams finished at approximately 11:30 last tuesday and since then I’ve been drunk every night bar one. It’s been pretty mental, the sort of bender the Daily Mail would crucify me for if i was worth writing about.

But the key problem i’ve faced is this: how do i fill the in between times, the time from when i wake up to about 7pm when i start drinking ( yes, early, guilty, sorry, student, see ya later). This has been solved with me kicking back and getting right into Harvest Moon: Back To Nature for the Playstation. Let me tell you one thing: Harvest Moon is fucking Ream, in fact that exact facebook status netted me 3 likes and 4 or 5 comments. I won’t bore you with the details but only the essentials:

1) Harvest Moon is like a billion times better than skanky farmville – so much better in fact that i refuse to capitalise farmville’s name.

2) I have a dog called Io, a horse called Lucius and three chickens called Gabby, Harry and Larry.

3) Tom lives on the mother fucking RENEGADE FARM.

and 4)

This girl is a BITCH. Seriously. Like she is permanently on my case for talking to her or giving her flowers and when she’s not bitching under her breath about me TO MY FACE, she’s whining about her asshole brother Rick who is their parents favourite.

Oh and a gratuitous 5) Winning the swimming comp on the first day of summer is impossible. Either i come second or i drown. And both of those options suck.

What I resent as well is that i’m forced to interact with society as well, what if i just wanted to water my crops and kick back with Io and light up spliff on the ranch? Well I can’t because the Mayor is at my house every other day telling me about some festival that’s on. Is that his job or does he just want to seduce me? Kind of life the mayor in The Business.